Botanist, sous-chef, dog father of two fur-babies. Not really, but legally that's how all internet bios are required to be written these days. We checked.
In brief, Carlos is a UCSB grad and Bay Area transplant that dreams of owning the San Francisco Giants but will settle for a day game in the shade with some garlic fries. On the show, he serves as the grizzled, set in his ways character that has seen it all and adds the context and skepticism necessary in a world full of the new and exciting. He's going to go out on a limb and say that this whole "Internet" thing may have legs.
January 11th, 2023 | 1 hr 29 mins
When you have so much money you have to make your Sonoma estate look like Apple Park, the Wall Street Journal is there. Or rather, Carlos teaches Ryan the art of the hate read. This is a good one.
This week: cycling directions, EV sell through, and a hypothetical touch screen MacBook Pro. Boop. 👆🏻
January 4th, 2023 | 1 hr 9 mins
I mean, if we’re talking about a secondary character taking over the entire show with extremely mixed results — is there even a difference between Elon and Elmo? @ ryan, not me.
This week: a trip to the Social Security office, a Matter explainer, and more choice is good thing. 🚗
December 14th, 2022 | 1 hr 43 mins
You don’t come at Taylor with that weak af Christmas album and expect to come out on top, Bublé.
This week: forgotten pre-orders, a more considered take on the villain of our streaming future, and Ryan’s sweet solution for smart home woes. 💸.
November 30th, 2022 | 1 hr 48 mins
You know that pet project you spend 10 years on and it never really gets any better? That, but it’s a listening device in millions of homes that cost tens of billions in R&D that sometimes turns off your lights when you ask.
This week: mood lighting, holiday lighting, and the Ford F-150 Lightning. 🛻.
November 9th, 2022 | 1 hr 29 mins
We’re happy to report that we’ve been offered our own show on Peacock. Follow us as we upgrade one of the Painted Ladies with the latest in smart home connectivity and gadgetry. Uh, you’ll understand why it’s rated TV-MA for language pretty quickly.
This week: proper puck prep, network naming nuances, and assorted ancillary alliteration. 🏡.
November 2nd, 2022 | 1 hr 34 mins
Fivey Fox told us the best predictor of partisan lean during a midterm election cycle is average spend at Dunkin’ Donuts divided by number of Casper mattresses discarded per year in a particular district.
This week: anti-social shared photo libraries, sports media rights, and a reluctant look at Tesla bro’s purchase of twitter dot com. 🐦.
October 26th, 2022 | 1 hr 44 mins
Yeah yeah, sure the Matter standard is finalized but when will someone come out with a smarter ‘hide-a-key’ rock? Is that what Thread is about?
This week: Gonger’s food truck, Carlos’ haunted iPhone, and Taylor’s new album. 🕛.
October 19th, 2022 | 2 hrs 4 mins
The defining quality of strong character is being willing to change your mind when presented with new information — about mesh WiFi. Nothing else though, stick to your priors politicians.
This week: golden sandwich ratios, watchOS 9 can’t catch a vibe, and Apple’s non-event fall event.🍎
October 5th, 2022 | 1 hr 40 mins
What would you do-ooo-ooooh — to avoid a deposition after you reneged on a binding agreement to buy a social media company?
(read in the tune of the Klondike bar jingle)
This week: tapbacks, bridge trolls, and midnight fingerprints. 🥅
September 28th, 2022 | 1 hr 51 mins
They say the shortest, saddest story ever comprised in a single sentence is “For sale: baby shoes, never worn.” One of your cohosts reminds us that that is untrue. “No tip.”
This week: Clipper ships, AirBuds, and Disney considers a hard Brexit. ⛴️.
September 21st, 2022 | 1 hr 36 mins
Turns out if you run enough independent bookstores out of business, you eventually amass enough money and marketshare to force people that are just trying to buy trash bags to watch a mediocre football game. Who knew?
This week: software updates, Ryan has a new phone, and Carlos has a stroke of genius if only he had a time machine. 🥃.
September 7th, 2022 | 1 hr 54 mins
Why did elementary school classrooms all have those yard sticks that you never ended up using? Well, turns out educators were playing the long game to help you understand this week’s episode.
It’s Apple event time, kids. Buckle up. 🍎.
August 30th, 2022 | 1 hr 43 mins
In economics, a mouse price spiral occurs when consumers get so desensitized to a media conglomerate raising fees that they no longer cry at the end of Pixar movies.
This week: David Zaslav channels his inner Jojo and has a demo day with the HBO Max streaming catalog while Carlos can’t stop watching his new slightly less dumb Roomba. 📺.
August 17th, 2022 | 1 hr 31 mins
Well that was certainly a long one week. What’d we miss?
This week: one last attorney client meeting with Jimmy and Kim, a tiny new listener joins the fold, and a summer vibes check in. ⛱️.
June 22nd, 2022 | 1 hr 26 mins
New Mac desktop who dis? Seriously though, it’s tough to tell through this potato of a webcam.
This week: moving day, sports deals, and the universal truth that everything that proclaims to be smart is actually dumb.
June 8th, 2022 | 2 hrs 3 mins
Maybe the 13" MacBook Pro with Touch Bar is like that weird blood orange flavor of San Pellegrino. I mean, someone has to be buying it otherwise they wouldn’t keep making it?
This week: bottle service, volcano bread, and generally accepted Kabletown accounting practices.💰.